Degrees of Protection
by Cynthia and Josie
Summary: You can always have a chance to go back, once under love's protective wings.
1. Unprotected

**Series** // Degrees of Protection   
**Title** // Unrotected   
**Author** // Cynthia and Josie   
**Rating** // PG-13   
**Category** // romance   
**Pairing(s)** // Koushirou/Yamato   
**Disclaimer** // We don't own Digimon.   
**Author's Note 1** // You asked for it, you got it. The story of how Yamato and Koushirou broke up. This isn't a happy fic. You'll probably call it out of character, but it's a breakup fic, so people are gonna be snippy, snappy, and annoyed. Deal with it.   
**Author's Note 2** // Um...yeah. Let's hear it for the girly blonde or something like that. -_-;; Yeah. Oh yeah, and for sadness and such, too. And some OOC-ness...yeah... 

Koushirou was busily working away on his computer when Yamato came in, hugging him from behind and kissing his cheek. "Kou-chan." He bit his lip and snuggled closer as Koushirou continued to work. "Kou-chan? Dinner's ready." 

"It can wait." Koushirou muttered absently as he continued to work. Yamato blinked, biting his lip again as he managed to get into Koushirou's lap and look up at him. 

"But it'll get cold..." He had worked for so long on dinner, and now Koushirou was just ignoring it! 

The redhead snapped sharply, "Yamato, I'm busy!!" 

"You've been working for five hours straight. C-can't you just take a little break?" Yamato looked at him with pleading eyes. "I...I never get to spend any time with you anymore." 

"I am _trying_ to finish this, Yamato, stop nagging me!" Koushirou's temper was on the verge of snapping altogether. Yamato closed his eyes. 

"Kou-chan, please, just a little bit, just for dinner, please. You need to eat." 

The Child of Knowledge was getting just a bit tired of this. " Are you deaf??" He'd already said it once, he didn't want to have to _keep_ on saying it. 

"N-no..." Yamato got up, not looking at him. "I just thought..." 

"Just get out of the way." Koushirou growled, annoyed. Yamato sighed quietly, nodding. 

"I'm...I'm sorry. I didn't mean to disturb you." The blonde tried to calm himself down, not wanting to cry in front of Koushirou. He had found himself getting more and more emotional as the years had passed, and he still didn't like showing tears in front of someone else, especially someone he loved as much as he loved Koushirou. "I just thought it would be nice to spend a little time together on our anniversary." 

Koushirou didn't so much as bat an eye on Yamato ran out of the room, still involved in his new program. Yamato leaned against a wall outside, fighting back the tears. _I know what'll get Kou-chan to notice me. I'll make him something special. I know just what to do._ He headed into the kitchen to get started, then noticed one of the ingredients he needed was stored high on one of the shelves. He bit his lip, staring up at it for a few moments before he started to climb carefully onto the counter to get it. 

He was balanced very precariously as he reached for the spice on the very top of the rack, and as his hand closed on it, he felt himself slipping. He tumbled off backwards, bringing the whole spice rack with him, and landed with a thump and a pained squeak. He stayed where he was, too hurt to move for a few moments, then winced as he heard Koushirou's angry voice. 

"What are you _doing_??" The redhead sounded very angry as Yamato tried to stammer out an answer. "_Well?_ What is it?" 

Yamato gulped. "I was just trying to...to get something." 

"Why?" 

The blonde winced faintly. "I needed it to finish making something." He half-whispered, hearing Koushirou's footsteps as the redhead came closer to the kitchen. 

"You're clumsy!" Koushirou glared down at him angrily, entering the doorway and glaring at the one still laying on the floor, stammering apologies. "Get up!" 

Yamato tried to, but cried out in pain and protest as he did, tears sliding down his cheeks. "I...I'm sorry. I didn't mean to disturb you. I'll be fine, you...you can go f-finish your work." 

"Get up." Koushirou said flatly, looking down at him with dark black eyes. Yamato tried again, whimpering in pain as he slumped back down. 

"I-I'll..." He almost flinched as Koushirou started to reach for him. "No...d-don't worry a-about me...I'm fine. J-just...you said you have to finish, right? I...it would be better if you do that." Yamato smiled the best he could right then. Koushirou glared at him, then headed back to his computer, his mind already going back to work as he did so. 

Yamato kept trying to get up, holding in the sounds of pain to the best of his ability, until he slumped down in defeat, tears coursing down his cheeks. "Help me...please help me..." He squeezed his eyes shut, noting in the back of his mind that Koushirou almost seemed to notice him, then shook his head. He was _going_ to do this. Using all of his strength, he stood up, his back to Koushirou now, and his shirt unknowingly riding up to reveal a very nasty bruise on his back. Koushirou, looking over his shoulder, frowned as he saw it. 

"You're going to the hospital." He said flatly. Yamato blinked, looking towards him in confusion. 

"Wh-what?" 

Koushirou stood up. "You heard me. You're going to the hospital. You've hurt yourself pretty badly. You probably shouldn't even be standing." 

Yamato bit his lip, shaking his head slightly. "I-it's just a bruise." He didn't look at Koushirou. "I'm fine, it...it doesn't hurt that much. I've had a lot worse, a-and...and it'll heal up real soon." He stared down at the mess he'd made falling. "I...I don't want to go to the hospital...n-not on our anniversary." 

"What?" 

The blonde spoke up louder, but firmly. "I don't...don't want to go there on our anniversary..." It was their anniversary, and he wanted to be here with his beloved. Not in some crummy hospital where it smelled bad and was disgusting. 

"You're joking." Koushirou was startled. "Our anniversary?" 

Yamato nodded slightly, and almost started crying as he realized that Koushirou had forgotten it. He was just about to write it off, to claim that it wasn't their anniversary, his mistake, not wanting Koushirou mad at him. He could see Koushirou looked at the calendar and frowning. "I...I must have the wrong day..." 

Koushirou frowned more. "I'd remember it." Yamato nodded slightly, still not looking at Koushirou, wincing as he saw the redhead go over and close his computer down. "You're going to the hospital." 

"No." 

"Yes!" Koushirou snapped the word like an order, then picked up Yamato easily and carried him out. Yamato wasn't very heavy, even after all his growth had come in, and Koushirou could handle him with ease. The blonde trembled in pain. 

"Kou-chan, you're hurting me!" he complained, and Koushirou just kept on carrying him. 

"You have to go to the doctor." He was resolute in this. Yamato was hurt, and hurt meant doctor. 

The blonde shook his head hard. "No...I don't, I swear I don't! Please, Kou-chan!" 

"Shut up." Koushirou was tired and cranky and annoyed over a lot of things he couldn't explain to Yamato, things about the computer program he was working on that just wasn't working out right. All he really wanted was the peace and quiet to get it all done, then he'd lavish all the attention on his Yamato that he deserved, and then some. 

Both of them remained quiet until they'd gotten to the hospital, and Yamato started to try and pull away again. "Kou-chan, can't we please just go home?" That got another order to shut up, and Yamato's blue eyes widened. "Why are you being so mean?" This was just not like his Kou-chan! 

"You've hurt yourself when you didn't have to!" Koushirou snapped, and Yamato winced, in pain both physical and emotional. 

"You act like I _meant_ to fall." That hurt more than the pain in his back did. 

Koushirou shook his head. "You weren't being careful." 

"I didn't want to disturb you!" Yamato flinched back from the dark glare that Koushirou delivered to him, his eyes tearing up again. "I just want to go home, please, Kou-chan, can't we just go back home? This is stupid, it's just a bruise, they can't do anything for it." 

The redhead paid no attention to him as he brought him to the desk and explained things to a nurse. The neatly dressed lady nodded them both to a seat after telling them that a doctor would be with them as soon as possible. 

Yamato looked at him as they sat down together. "You're not listening to me! Kou-chan!" The other didn't even look at him. "Will you at least give me some sort of sign that you're hearing what I'm saying?" 

"Rest." Koushirou told him, and Yamato sighed, standing up with some difficulty. The redhead wouldn't let him move away, though, holding him firmly by a wrist. 

"Let me go." Yamato breathed quietly as Koushirou shook his head. "Please let go of me. You're hurting me!" 

Koushirou could be rather pigheaded when he wanted something, though. "No. You need to see a doctor." 

"That doesn't change the fact that you're hurting me, Kou-chan!" Yamato declared. "Let me go!" Koushirou released him, and the blonde held his wrist to his chest, looking at him. "Why are you being so mean to me?" He wanted an answer and he wanted it now! 

The redhead shook his head. "I'm not. You need help, Yamato. You've hurt yourself. You _know_ that." 

Yamato looked at him with hurt blue eyes. "I just wanted to make you something special! You keep acting like I _meant_ to fall." He turned away from the unforgiving black eyes. "You forgot, you know. Why do you think I spent all day cooking? Why do you think I was making my brownies for you? It's our anniversary and you forgot all about it!" 

Koushirou reached for him as he saw the calendar on _this_ wall, and he knew that Yamato was right, he _had_ forgotten. His heart broke as he heard the sobs coming out of his love. Koushirou put a hand on his shoulder, and Yamato turned and threw his arms around him, crying into Koushirou's shirt. 

"You forgot all about it! You forgot and you yelled at me and you don't want to spend any time with me!" Yamato sniffled, being adorable even in his sorrow, and Koushirou patted him on the shoulder gently. 

"I'm sorry." He said quietly, and Yamato looked up at him in shock. "I'm sorry." 

The blonde shook his head. "Don't apologize." He snuggled closer into Koushirou. "It's my fault. It...it was..." 

Koushirou frowned slightly. "Hush." 

"But..." 

The redhead shook his head firmly. "I said hush." 

Yamato was not going to be deterred however. "Kou-chan...if...if I hadn't kept bothering you, and if I hadn't been so stupid to climb onto the counter to try to get that spice in the first place, this wouldn't have happened." 

"Yama-chan." Koushirou said quietly. "It's my fault. If I had paid more attention to you..." 

The two of them went back and forth in that vein for a while, both refusing to think the other was at fault in the slightest. Yamato sniffled. "I don't understand why you just won't admit that it was my fault." He snuggled into Koushirou, mumbling that it was his fault over and over again, until Koushirou growled softly in anger. He jumped back a bit, looking away. "You're mad at me again." 

"Yamato." Koushirou said quietly, and the blonde looked back at him, to be surprised by a tender kiss. 

Yamato blushed deeply. "Wh-what was th-th-that for?" 

"I love you." 

The blonde's eyes widened in shock as he blushed. "I...I love you, Kou-chan." He snuggled into Koushirou the best he could just then. He would have willingly given _everything_ to his lover if he'd asked for it right then. "I want to go home." 

"You need to stay." Koushirou said firmly, and Yamato started to sniffle, clinging to him. 

"I want to go home. Please...I..." Yamato trembled, not wanting to say what was on his mind, but feeling he _had_ to. 

Koushirou shook his head. "We're staying. No buts." 

Yamato sniffled again. "Please...I...I'm scared." There, he'd said it. 

"You'll be fine." Koushirou didn't want to listen to Yamato's fears right now. They'd leave once the doctor had checked him out, and not one second sooner. 

"Please, Kou-chan." Yamato begged. "I just...I don't want to be here." 

The redhead was firm. "Yes. Yes, we are staying." Yamato pouted even more, about to protest again when Koushirou cut him off. "We. Are. Staying. No questions." 

Fat tears had just started to roll down Yamato's cheeks when the doctor came over to them. Koushirou explained in a clinical tone what was going on, and what he was worried over, that Yamato could have injuries that didn't show right away. The doctor nodded slightly. 

"Come on, this won't take long." He motioned to Yamato, who clung onto Koushirou for dear life, still crying. 

The doctor nodded slightly, then looked at Yamato, his voice quite gentle and soothing. "I'm not going to hurt you, I just have to check to make sure it's just a bruise is all." 

Yamato just kept clinging, the tears still rolling down. Koushirou looked at him. "Yama-chan. Let him check you out." The blonde shook his head as he pressed _very_ close to Koushirou. "Yama-chan." The redhead started to pull away, and Yamato shrieked, moving so that he was in the exact same position with Koushirou as he was before the redhead had moved away. 

The doctor chuckled, amused. "Maybe you should come with us." Koushirou sighed and nodded, then followed the doctor to an examining room. The professional motioned for Yamato to be laid face down on the table, and Koushirou nodded. 

"Yamato, get on the table, face-down." Koushirou told him when the other didn't move, not having seen the motion. Yamato looked up at him, terrified. 

"I..." He blushed. "But I don't want to be away from you." 

Koushirou patted his hand gently. "You won't be." Yamato could be _very_ clingy at times. 

Yamato didn't move an inch, though. "C-can't you...can't you lay down with me? Please?" 

Koushirou considered it for a moment, then laid down on the table, Yamato laying on top of him, to the amusement of the doctor as he lifted Yamato's shirt up to look. He examined carefully, then stepped back. 

"Well, it looks as if it's just some bruising, nothing more." the doctor reported. "It should clear up in a few days." 

Yamato looked at Koushirou hopefully. "Can we go home now?" The redhead looked at the doctor, who nodded his permission, and Koushirou nodded back to Yamato, who squealed in joy and snuggled into him adorably. "Home?" 

* * *

A few days later, Yamato was straddling Koushirou's lap again, snuggling into him, and kissing Koushirou's neck quite softly as the other worked on his computer. "Yama." Koushirou murmured. "I'm working on something." 

Yamato nodded slightly as he bit his lip. "C-can I..." He blushed a most becoming shade of red. "Do you m-mind if I stay with you o-on your lap?" Koushirou just gave him a look, and Yamato blushed even deeper. "O-or I could just...go..." 

"I'm busy." The redhead said flatly. He had resumed his normal distant manner after they'd come back from the hospital, and Yamato could barely keep himself from complaining out loud that Koushirou had promised they'd spend time together, and they hadn't. The blonde worked his way over to the couch and sniffled, fighting back his tears once more. "Hush." Koushirou muttered absently as he worked through a particularly tricky piece of code. 

Yamato sniffled again. "But you promised!" 

"I'm busy!" Koushirou snapped at him, and Yamato shook his head. 

"You've said that for the past four days." 

The redhead looked over at him. "And I am." 

"You also promised that you'd make time for me." Yamato looked down sadly. "Don't you care about me at all anymore?" 

Koushirou's temper was fraying. This thing was almost acting as if it were _alive_, causing problems for him. "I said I'm busy!" 

"Aren't you always?" Yamato looked at him sadly. "Aren't you always doing something that's more important than me, more important than what I want, more important than what I need? I could be bleeding to death, and you wouldn't even notice, you're so wrapped up in being busy with your computer!" 

"Stop being so selfish!" Koushirou growled impatiently. "This is important!" 

Yamato curled up on the couch. "You wouldn't care." That hurt, deep inside, worse than anything else had. 

"You could try for another job to hold for a week." Koushirou drawled at him. Yamato glared for a moment. 

"I have tried! I've tried twenty times and been fired after two days, maximum, on any of them! And I've tried to find another job, but no one will hire me! What would you have me do, sell myself in order to make some money?" 

Koushirou snorted. "No one else would want you." 

"Oh, of course not. After all, I'm just some worthless piece of trash who isn't worth the time of day, who isn't worth anyone's attention." Yamato stood up. "If you'll excuse me, I'm sure that there's something sharp enough to make sure no one has to waste time or attention on me anymore." 

"Stop being so theatric." Koushirou was starting to dive back into his computer work. Yamato could be so annoying at times... 

The blonde was not believing his ears, but at the same time, he felt as if it were only right. "That's all I am to you, isn't it? An act, just a pretty face with no feelings behind it. I need to spend time with you, it's the way I am, Kou-chan! And you never do anything with me anymore! You don't even hold me anymore, not even at night!" 

Koushirou spared him a glance. "Yamato, you're overacting. You're not on stage anymore." 

"And I suppose I couldn't possibly know what I'm talking about." Yamato refused to look at Koushirou, not wanting him to see the tears, to see the weakness. 

"I've told you how important this is." The redhead reminded him. "I have to do things like pay rent and bills." 

Yamato shook his head. "...and that, of course, gets raked up so high because you're dating someone who's just so "high maintenance," of course." 

"You are." 

The blonde shook his head sadly. "Then maybe it would be better if I was gone?" 

"Where would you go?" Koushirou dived back into his work fully, hardly listening to anything else. 

Yamato shrugged. "Would it matter?" He stifled his emotions; Koushirou hadn't caught his hidden meaning in the question. Maybe Koushirou didn't care about him anymore... "Is there anything specific you'd like for dinner?" The redhead barely shrugged, and Yamato bit his lip, wanting to be the perfect housekeeper for him, if nothing else. "You..." He shivered a tad. "I want to make sure I make something you actually want this time, Kou-chan...I'll...I'll be in the kitchen..." 

Koushirou didn't look up as Yamato headed into the kitchen, going straight for the knife drawer and searching through it. "He wouldn't even care." The blonde murmured louder than he'd intended, holding the sharpest knife they owned. He didn't even notice a few others that fell to the floor with a harsh clanging noise. "I'd be...I'd be doing him a favor..." He held the knife to his wrist. "H-he's right...no one would want me...I'm just a stupid, worthless, high maintenance bitch..." Yamato closed his eyes and tried to cut, but his hand froze as if denying him even this. He threw the knife the floor and collapsed to his knees, sobbing. 

"Yamato, would you cut the noise, I'm trying to work in here!" Koushirou snapped harshly. Yamato trembled, hiccupping slightly before he cut it off into sniffles. 

"I'm such an idiot." He whispered to himself. "Such a weak idiot. I can't even do it. I can't even help him out and take myself off his hands." He picked up the knife and stared at it before he put it and all the others that had fallen back into the draw and slammed it shut. 

"Keep it down!" Koushirou yelled, and Yamato jumped, staring brokenly at the now-closed drawer. 

"Kou-chan...Kou-chan, would it hurt..." He wasn't sure if he really heard the harsh demand of what he wanted, or if it was just in his imagination. "Would it hurt to die?" 

The redhead growled, not liking being pulled out of his work. "What are you talking about?" 

"D-do you think it would hurt to die?" Yamato asked a bit louder. Koushirou sounded quite angry. 

"How should I know?" 

Yamato nodded slightly to himself. "Would anyone miss me?" He shuddered, repeating it louder without even realizing it. "Would anyone miss me if I died?" He slid down to the floor, tears in his eyes. "W-would anyone notice? I...I'm just a stupid little bitch...not worth the time of day...K-Kou-chan would be better without me...w-would he notice? W-would he care?" 

Koushirou turned towards the kitchen door, distracted by the barely audible mumblings. "Are you whining again?" 

"I should...just do it." Yamato shook his head, his eyes distant. "I should do it for Kou-chan...he'd be happier if I was dead...and I only want him happy..." He trembled a little, tears spilling again silently. "But I'm too scared to..." He headed into the other room, hugging Koushirou from behind as he buried his face in the redhead's shoulder. 

"Yamato!" Koushirou was at a very delicate point, and he kept being interrupted! 

"W-would you notice if I died?" Yamato asked, repeating himself when Koushirou demanded it. The computer genius looked at him in surprise. 

"Of course!" 

Yamato looked at him. "B-because I wouldn't be here to bother you anymore...you'd be happier, wouldn't you?" He sounded only interested, not accusing. 

Koushirou wasn't happy, though. "Yamato, stop this." 

"Please, I just...I need to know." The blonde quivered, staring at him. "Please just tell me if I'm right." 

"Yes!" Koushirou snapped, annoyed, irritated, and just wanting the peace and quiet to finish what he'd been working on for over two weeks. He had a deadline and he was going to miss it, they were going to lose money they needed badly... 

Yamato nodded slightly. "I...would there be a way that's less painful than any other...?" Koushirou growled angrily, and Yamato ducked his head. "I only want to make you happy." 

"Then stop interrupting me!" 

Yamato nodded again, then slipped out of the room stopping only long enough to murmur, "I...I love you." Koushirou didn't look up, only kept on working. Yamato headed into the bathroom, closed and locked the door, then huddled into himself, trembling. "He...he wants me to...to...to..." He shuddered, holding his hands to his chest as his heart broke. 

"Yamato!" The shout was loud and irritated. "Where's dinner?" 

The blonde bit his lip, then headed out. "What would you like me to make for you, Koushirou-sama?" He didn't even notice the change in what he'd called Koushirou. The redhead named off a few dishes, and Yamato nodded, heading into the kitchen. Inside half an hour he had it all ready, working as fast as he could without screwing it up, and brought it out to him. 

"Here you go, Koushirou-sama." He gave the redhead a quick peck on the cheek and went back to start cleaning things up. Just as he was done, he heard the sound of the plate being pushed away and hitting what sounded like one of Koushirou's computer books. "Are you finished, Koushirou-sama?" he asked politely, going back in there. The other nodded, and Yamato smiled, feeling that it didn't reach his eyes, but not really caring right now. "Is there anything else you'd like, Koushirou-sama?" 

"No." Koushirou was already heading back into his work once more. 

"Just let me know if there's anything I can do for you, Koushirou-sama." Yamato asked, watching as the redheaded nodded, absorbed in his work again. He headed back into the kitchen, and spent the next several hours cleaning up, making certain he kept well out of the other's way. He worked until everything in there _sparkled_ with cleanliness. 

"Yamato?" Koushirou looked over at him several hours later as his computer shut down. The blonde looked back over at him at once. 

"Koushirou-sama?" He asked quietly. "Do you need something?" 

The redhead nodded. "Let's go to bed." 

Yamato blinked in confusion. "I...I just have to finish..." 

"Let's go." 

The blonde looked down sadly. "I just need to finish cleaning a couple more things, Koushirou-sama. I've been neglecting my duties to keep it clean." Koushirou frowned; he knew perfectly well that Yamato cleaned everyday. "I can't let you live in such a filthy house, Koushirou-sama." 

Koushirou was getting rather annoyed. "I said bed." 

"As soon as I finish, Koushirou-sama." Yamato turned back to cleaning, trembling. He didn't like not doing what Koushirou said, but he had to. "I'll be done soon. You should get some rest, you need it." 

"Did you _hear_ me?" Koushirou hated hearing the sound of other people moving around when he was trying to sleep, that was why he wanted them to go to bed at the same time. Yamato nodded his understanding, and Koushirou headed for the bedroom. 

Yamato was about to follow, then bit his lip as he looked around the apartment. "It's not right for Koushirou-sama to live in such a filthy place. It's not right...how could I let it get this dirty? I...I could never be good enough for him if I let his home get this dirty." 

"Yamato! Get in here!!" The cry came sharp and commanding, and Yamato obeyed, head bowed. 

"Koushirou-sama, I don't deserve to be..." He muttered, right over Koushirou's annoyed 'whatever'. "I really have to finish cleaning, Koushirou-sama. I'll finish as quickly as possible." 

As the redhead slid into bed, he glared over at his blonde companion. "I don't know _why_ you're still cleaning, we could eat off the ceiling!" 

"W...what?" Yamato looked confused. What in the world did Koushirou mean by that? "What do you mean, Koushirou-sama?" 

Koushirou glared at him much more harshly. "The apartment is clean enough!" 

"But it's..." 

"Shut up." Koushirou ordered, not noticing the pain that flashed through Yamato's eyes for a moment before they went dead again. "Come to bed. Now." 

Yamato nodded and changed into his nightclothes, then curled into the bed, taking as little space as he could. He laid there, not fighting back as Koushirou ran a loving hand down him, simply opening himself up for the redhead. Koushirou stopped suddenly, and the blonde looked over at him. "Why did you stop, Koushirou-sama? I-isn't this what you want?" 

"What is _wrong_ with you?" Koushirou snapped, glaring at him in angry disgust. 

Yamato was even more confused now. "Koushirou-sama? I don't...understand..." 

"You've lost your mind." Koushirou snapped, sitting up. "I am _not_ dealing with this anymore." This was not the kind of thing he'd had in mind at all. 

Yamato stared him, his voice strangled and harsh as if his entire life had just been completely torn from him. "Koushirou-sama? I...I don't understand. What did I do wrong? I...please tell me, Koushirou-sama, I...I have to fix it...it's my fault, just please, let me know what I did and I'll fix it." 

The redhead glared angrily at him. "You're a psycho prima donna! You can't stand that I might think about something that isn't you!" 

"I...I'll be better, I promise, Koushirou-sama." Yamato promised, then paled at what was said next. 

"I'm leaving." 

"N-no! Please don't...Koushirou-sama, please don't go. I'll be good, I'll stop bothering you all of the time. I swear, just please don't go!" Yamato begged as Koushirou got out of bed and started to pack quickly. The blonde jumped up and ran over to him, wrapping his arms around him. "I..I know I've been horrible, and I know you have no reason to stay, but, please...I need you." He stared as Koushirou shoved him away, then fell back on the bed. "Koushirou-sama! Please, listen!" Koushirou kept on packing, and Yamato came to a horrible conclusion. "I...if you're final on this, then...Koushirou-sama, wouldn't it be...better if I were the one to go?" 

The redhead turned finally to look at him. "What are you calling me?" Yamato tilted his head in confusion. "Well?" 

Yamato still had no answer, and Koushirou was not at all happy with what was going on here, growling furiously. Yamato trembled a little. "I...Koushirou-sama, I don't understand..." 

"You're calling me Koushirou-sama." Koushirou said quietly. Yamato blinked and looked away. He hadn't really thought about it, it had just happened. "Well?" 

Yamato stared down. "I don't know why, Koushirou-sama. But...if you're sure you want to do this, _I'll_ go." It killed him to say it, but he wouldn't _not_ say it. As Koushirou grabbed his bag, Yamato grabbed Koushirou's legs. "What would be the point of me staying here, Koushirou-sama? The apartment is in your name...I have no money. It would make sense for you to stay and me to go...I'll...I'll just get all of my things together and...and...move in with my father again." He got up and started to gather his things together. 

"Fine." Koushirou knew Yamato was right, but he didn't have to be graceful about it. He watched as Yamato gathered his few things together, then looked at him. 

"I only want you happy, Koushirou-sama." Yamato looked away quickly, and Koushirou snorted. 

"No, you want to be a prima donna." 

Yamato closed his eyes against the tears as he started to leave, then paused at the apartment door to put his shoes on. "Did you mean it? When you said that you would be happy if I die, did you mean it?" 

"If you're going to go, go! Look for someone else to leech off of!" Koushirou snapped. He wanted this over with as soon as possible. It would be less painful for the both of them. 

_He means yes._ Yamato sighed mentally, then looked at him. "Just one more question. Please, I need to know. Did you ever love me? Even for just a minute?" 

Koushirou glared at him. "Ishida." His voice was cold and unfriendly. He hadn't thought his lovable Yama-chan could be this much of a self-centered jerk. Couldn't he understand that he had to get this finished before they could spend time together? No, it was all him, him, him. 

"Please, answer me." Yamato wouldn't look at him. "I...I need to know." 

Koushirou sighed, and nodded. "Yes." 

"Thank you." Yamato nodded slightly and opened the door, still not looking at him. Doing that would show the tears streaming down his cheeks, and that doing this was killing him. "Thank you for everything, Koushirou-sama." He stepped out, dropping his keys inside the door as he closed it, then headed for the elevator. In his heart, without even being consciously aware, he decided he would find someone who looked like his beloved Kou-chan. Yamato no longer cared what happened to himself, though. All he wanted was to be back with the one he loved. 

To no longer feel so alone, and unprotected. 

To Be Continued 


	2. Protected

**Series** // Degrees of Protection   
**Title** // Protected   
**Author** // Cynthia and Josie   
**Rating** // PG-13   
**Category** // romance   
**Pairing(s)** // Koushirou/Yamato   
**Disclaimer** // We don't own either of these beings. Ah, but such fun if we did...   
**Author's Note 1** // This was her idea. Trust me, this was **her** idea...not that I objected ;)   
**Author's Note 2** // :P Yeah, _all_ my fault, I bet. :P Just because I thought it'd be cute... 

Izumi Koushirou was deep in the bowels of his computer when the sound came at the door. He paused for a moment, not quite certain if he'd heard it at first, then went back to his work. _Just my imagination._

He was about to plunge back into disemboweling the things inside when another knock came, too loud and too clear for it to be anything else. _Who the heck is it this time?_ He was in an uncharacteristically bad mood at the moment; somehow a virus had sneaked past his protections and had wreaked havoc on his hard drive. Whoever was at the door was going to get it, badly. 

As he opened the door, the person on the other side threw himself onto Koushirou, sobbing like some kind of maniac. "I...I...I didn't know where else to _go_!" 

The redhead did a double take. "Yamato?" It _was_ the usually elegant and refined blonde, now reduced to a rather pathetic pile of tears, and clinging to Koushirou's shirt like a lifeline. "What is it?" His ex-boyfriend looked up at him, revealing a badly bruised cheek. 

Koushirou found himself frowning; he might have broken up with Yamato, but this wasn't right. The bruise was blatantly that of a hand. _That boyfriend of his._ "What happened?" 

"I...I fell." Yamato buried his face into Koushirou's shirt again as he spoke. The redhead wasn't buying that, however. He knew damned well that Yamato would lie like a rug sometimes. 

"Yamato..." He spoke quietly, but firmly, and Yamato looked back up at him, an exceedingly bright and _painfully_ obvious fake smile twisting his lips. 

"I fell!" 

Koushirou shook his head. "You didn't." Yamato turned his face away, and the other frowned. "Don't lie to me." 

"I'm not!" 

The redhead frowned more, feeling quite irritated suddenly. "You are!" 

Yamato jumped back, looking away, obviously startled by Koushirou's unaccustomed harshness. "I...I shouldn't have come here." He closed his eyes as a few more tears slipped down his cheeks. "I'll...I'll go." 

"Answer me." Koushirou was quite certain of what had happened, but he wanted to hear it from Yamato first. 

The blonde just shook his head violently, all of his usual defenses stripped away to show the emotionally vulnerable one beneath. "I'm sorry I disturbed you." He started to turn away, but Koushirou grabbed his arm. Yamato shrieked at once and started to pull away. "N-no! It's my fault. I can make it right this time, I can fix things! I couldn't do that with you, but if I just go back to _him_!!" Koushirou could tell Yamato was quite nearly hysterical. 

"What?" 

"Let go." Yamato murmured. "Please, let go." 

Koushirou shook his head. "No. Answer me." 

"Please let go!" Yamato was begging now, and it twisted inside of Koushirou to see him so ruined. This was not the Yamato he had known before. "I have to go back to him! I have to _fix_ everything!" 

"No!" Koushirou couldn't explain it to himself, he didn't even think about it, but he was _not_ going to let Yamato go back to that monster who had hurt him. Slowly he pulled Yamato into his arms, feeling the stick-thin young man trembling next to him. 

Yamato stared up at him with wide blue eyes full of tears. "Please, Koushirou...I can't lose someone else." 

The Child of Knowledge turned and shut the door, then looked back at Yamato. "Talk. To. Me." He was just about at the end of his own personal rope, and he knew neither of them was acting the way they usually did. It didn't seem to matter, though. Perhaps this was what was necessary. 

Yamato's lip trembled as he threw himself at Koushirou once again. "I need him. I need him...almost as much...almost as much as...." He trembled, then at Koushirou's urgings finished it. "Almost as much as I still need you." 

Koushirou frowned; he had never really gotten over Yamato himself. There was something in that blonde beauty that just wiggled his way into his heart and refused to go away. He couldn't be surprised Yamato felt the same way. _That doesn't mean I still **want** him, though._ He tried to tell himself. "Yamato." The other peeked at him for a moment, then looked away again. "Talk to me, please." 

The blonde bit his lip, still obviously refusing to look at his former lover, with tears still dripping down his cheeks. "I...I can't." 

"Why not?" 

Yamato shook his head. "Whatever I say will make you think that he's a bad person, but he's not, he's really not." 

Koushirou knew better, though. "If he hits you he is." He and Yamato might've broken up, but he would never stand for someone hitting this delicate flower. 

"He's not!" 

"He is." Yamato shook his head firmly in denial, but Koushirou was having none of it. "Yamato. Sit." As the other did so, the redhead looked firmly at him. "How often does he hit you?" Yamato didn't look up or answer. "Answer me!" 

Yamato looked away, then looked back. "Why should I? What reason do I have to tell you?" 

"To save yourself." 

Blue eyes narrowed. "I don't need to be saved." Koushirou only looked at the bruise quietly, and Yamato looked away from him. "Why now? Why do you pretend to care _now_?" 

Koushirou sighed. "We're still friends, Yamato." 

"That's all I ever was to you, a friend." Yamato was _sick_ of friends. Sora had dumped him because _you're a great friend, Yamato_, and when he thought he'd found someone to heal his aching heart in Koushirou, that had self-destructed as well. "And don't try to tell me that you ever truly cared. You didn't care before." His breath caught and he rubbed at his eyes with his sleeves. "You didn't care when you just walked away." 

"If you're done feeling sorry for yourself?" Koushirou was not in the mood for this, not in the slightest. 

"You left me all alone!" Yamato glared at him, his eyes full of tears. "You tore me apart completely! How ...how can you honestly tell me that you care?" Yamato looked away. "You didn't care." 

Koushirou was reaching the end of his rope. "Fine. Sorry I ever tried to do anything for you. I should just jump off a cliff!" He wasn't given to extravagance like this, but it just felt right at the moment. He was fairly sure he'd be surprised by himself later. 

Yamato shook his head and stood up. "I messed things up. I know that now. That's why even when I begged it wasn't enough." 

"Obviously the mere thought of me wanting to be your friend is so repugnant that you'd rather go back to being beaten than to talk to me!" Koushirou snapped. Yamato turned to look at him, his eyes sad. 

"I can't _just_ be your friend, though. It would kill me to _**just**_ be your friend. I gave you everything I could. I gave my heart to you. I can't go back to just being your friend, I just _can't_." He looked away, his voice quiet and almost inaudible. "Not when I still love you more than life itself." 

Koushirou sighed; he had heard quite clearly what Yamato had just said. _And I can't say that I don't still love **him** like that, either._

Yamato collapsed softly, tears welling out. "It was a mistake for me to come here." Koushirou stared at him for a moment, then something inside of him seemed to fall away, and he came over to the blonde, wrapping his arms around him and holding him as if he would never let go. Yamato tried to control himself, then he threw his arms around Koushirou and broke down into tears again. "I was only with him because I wanted to be with you again! I was looking for someone like you!" Koushirou held onto him, feeling his heart open up to the other once again, this time for good. "I'm stupid, though. I couldn't even do that right. I messed up so badly." Koushirou just held him and comforted him, murmuring things of quiet and of love, until Yamato's tears finally ceased, and they were just snuggling. 

The blonde closed his eyes as he rested his face against Koushirou's chest. He felt so peaceful, so calm, so drained. "I'm still in love with you. I still love you, and I still want to be with you. I...just don't know what to do without your love." 

Koushirou held him and looked down at him. _How could I have done that? How could I have left him? I'm supposed to be smart...but that was the dumbest thing I ever did._

"Please, just this once, just for this little bit, let me know what it feels like again. Let me be with you just this once." Tears fell from Yamato's closed eyes and into Koushirou's shirt. The redhead came to a decision, then slowly lifted Yamato's head up and gazed at him. The blonde opened his eyes and stared up at him, obviously scared. 

He had nothing to fear, however, as Koushirou leaned down and kissed him softly on the lips. Yamato's eyes opened quite wide as he blushed, then he looked down in embarrassment. "You...do you...really..." 

"Yes." The answer was simple and to the point, and filled with more meaning than anything Koushirou could recall saying in the last year. Yamato blushed even more, then pressed close to Koushirou, tears of joy spilling down before he looked up into Koushirou's kind eyes once more. The redhead leaned over, then gently kissed Yamato's nose. "I'm sorry for dumping you the way I did. I love you." 

"I love you, Kou-chan." Yamato snuggled close, once more closing his eyes. "I've always liked doing this with you. You're so warm. And we fit together...it's so comfortable." He tucked his head under Koushirou's chin and smiled; all the dark feelings from before banished in the warmth of love. "We'll be together forever, right, Kou-chan?" 

"Yes, Yama-chan." Koushirou had never meant anything more than he did those two simple words. 

Yamato looked up at him. "I..." He bit his lip for a moment. "I can stay with you?" 

"Forever." 

The blonde squealed happily and hugged Koushirou tightly, the smile on his face turning into a wide and rather cute yawn. "I'm sleepy." 

"Rest, then." Koushirou didn't want Yamato to ever leave, not without him, ever again. No one should hurt someone as wonderful as the blonde was, and he would see to it that it never happened again. 

Yamato tugged on Koushirou's shirt like a little child. "You'll rest with me?" Koushirou smiled and picked him up gently as he nodded. "Love you..." Yamato murmured as he fell asleep into Koushirou's arms, happy, as he hadn't been in far too long. 

"I love you." Koushirou smiled as he carried Yamato into the bedroom and tucked him into. The blonde held onto him even in his sleep, and Koushirou curled up next to him, feeling content and warm and loved and loving. He didn't even care about his computer, still in pieces. That didn't matter. What mattered was this wonderful creature in his arms, sleeping so peacefully, so obviously happy. _And I am too._ He knew now why he had been so out of sorts lately. It hadn't been because of what had happened to his computer: it was because he didn't have his Yama-chan with him. He cuddled the blonde close. "No one's ever going to hurt you again, Yama-chan." He promised. "I love you." He dropped a kiss onto the blonde's forehead, then cuddled him close, and let them both be protected in the unending glory that was their love. 


	3. Overprotected

**Series** // Degrees of Protection   
**Title** // Overprotected   
**Author** // Cynthia and Josie   
**Rating** // PG-13   
**Category** // romance   
**Pairing(s)** // Koushirou/Yamato   
**Disclaimer** // All within here are the property of Toei Entertainment, except for any creatures/situations we made ourselves. This not for profit.   
**Author's Note 1** // We did it again.   
**Author's Note 2** // Let's hear it for the girly blonde once again! *chuckles* I really get too much of a kick out of that. -_-;; 

"What are you doing, Kou-chan?" Yamato whispered into his boyfriend's ear. Koushirou was seated in the living room of their shared apartment, his computer in pieces at his feet. He made a noncommittal sound in answer to Yamato, who wrapped his arms around him. "What're you doing?" 

"Yama-chan!" Koushirou jumped, almost glaring at his gentle companion. "I'm trying to fix my computer." 

"Oh." Yamato smiled, then snuggled closer to him. Koushirou snuggled back, and the blonde kissed his cheek gently. "Um, do you need me to be quiet?" 

Koushirou smiled warmly at him. He had developed a _huge_ store of patience dealing with Yamato, who seemed almost more fragile and innocent every day, as if his mind were blocking out things to protect himself for some reason. "I can finish faster if you are." 

Yamato smiled, nuzzling against Koushirou's chest. "Okay." He squealed as Koushirou petted him gently on the head, and nuzzled a little more, shifting a bit closer moment by moment until he was in Koushirou's way again. 

"Yama-chan." The redhead smiled gently at him. "I can't fix this if you're in the way." 

"Oh. Sorry." Yamato bit his lip, then plucked at Koushirou's shirt. "I forgot." 

Koushirou smiled warmly. "It's all right." Yamato didn't move an inch, however, as Koushirou cuddled him gently. He looked up at the younger man with innocent blue eyes. 

"Can I have a kiss?" 

His boyfriend smiled, leaned down, and kissed him gently on the lips, then chuckled as Yamato mewled like a kitten. "Are you a kitten, Yama-chan? Should I get you some catnip?" Yamato pouted and pushed away from him, and Koushirou quickly hurried to apologize. "I was just teasing you, Yama-chan. I'm sorry." 

Yamato looked away. "I thought you had work to do." 

"Well, you want to watch me do it, right?" Koushirou hated getting Yamato upset; he was always so adorable about it, and made him feel bad even when he really shouldn't. 

The blonde just shrugged and shook his head. "Just finish what you were doing." He started away, and Koushirou started to work again on his repairs. He worked for maybe two minutes, before Yamato bounced back over and peeked over his shoulder again. 

"Yama-chan!" Koushirou almost glared at him, then picked up a screwdriver and gently poked Yamato in the stomach. The blonde yelped and pulled away, sniffling. "I didn't hurt you, Yama-chan." Yamato only looked hurt, and Koushirou decided to try something else. "Yama-chan? I am having a _serious_ ice cream craving. Could you run to the store and get me a quart of double chocolate peach?" 

Yamato looked at him, disappointment flickering across his face for a moment, then smiled. "Oh. Um. Yeah. Sure." He gave Koushirou a quick hug and a kiss. "I'll be back as soon as I can, okay?" 

Koushirou smiled wonderfully. Double chocolate peach was a very new, and _very_ rare flavor to find; he did want some, but he was also certain that by the time Yamato found some and brought it back, he'd been done with his computer fixing, and could spend uninterrupted quality time with him. "I can hardly wait." 

Yamato sighed softly as he got to the door of the room and let himself out of the apartment. He let out a sound that was almost like a sob, and tried to make it to the elevator. He wasn't ten steps out of the door before his legs gave out and he collapsed, curling up into a heap and crying. 

_I made him mad. I made him mad and he doesn't want me around, that's why he sent me off like this. It's just like before, he doesn't want me to spend any time with him at **all**!!_

Yamato didn't know how long he'd cried, but it was only a minute or two before he felt familiar arms around him, and he cried softly into Koushirou's chest. "What's wrong, Yama-chan?" The redhead asked gently. Yamato couldn't answer right away; all he could do was cry. 

"I'm sorry." He finally whispered out through his tears. "For making you mad." 

"What?" Koushirou was obviously confused, and Yamato repeated himself. "You didn't." The computer genius shook his head, but Yamato knew better. He'd been through it before. 

"You kicked me out so that..." Yamato shuddered again, not listening to whatever it was Koushirou was trying to say to soften the blows. "But...it's all right, it's my fault, I know that. I'll go...I'll go and get what you wanted, it's all right. I'll make it up to you, I'll be good now, I promise." 

"Yama-chan." Koushirou said it firmly and lifted Yamato's chin to look at him. "I love you, Yama-chan. I love you. You want me to spend time with you, right?" 

Yamato quivered in shock and fear. "I messed up, and I'm being so stupid about everything. I know you have things to do and I kept bothering you." He shook his head at Koushirou's denials. "I did. I upset you and I kept bothering you even when you told me to stop. I don't know how to keep anyone happy except for myself. That's why..." 

"Yama-chan. I'm not upset." 

Yamato pushed away from him and stood up. "You have things to finish, and I have to go get that ice cream for you, right?" He gave a weak fake smile. 

"I'll go with you." Koushirou offered. Yamato looked confused. 

"But you have to finish, right?" 

Koushirou shook his head again. When he was a kid he might've accepted Yamato's offer, but these days he knew that there were things far more important than a computer. "It can wait. Nothing is more important than you, Yama-chan." 

Yamato stared at him, stumbling over his words in shock. "You don't have to stop all of your plans for me." 

"I don't mind." Koushirou was going to get this through Yamato's head no matter how long it took. 

Yamato stared down at the floor. "I just wanted to help." He started to cry softly again. "I wanted to help you fix it." 

"Then let's go get the ice cream so you can." Koushirou said simply. Yamato sniffled in confusion. 

"But...how will that fix your computer?" He looked completely baffled; he knew that you did _not_ fix a computer with ice cream. He was that much computer literate. 

Koushirou smiled. "Because if we have the ice cream, we'll have something to look forward to after we've fixed it." 

"Oh." Yamato looked down again. _He doesn't look forward to spend time with **me**. Just the ice cream._ He looked away to the elevator. "You know I don't like having ice cream that much." 

"So we can get you something that you _do_ like." 

Yamato sighed quietly. "I just want to stay home." He squeaked a little as Koushirou gathered him into his arms, and cuddled him to him. "What...Kou-chan?" 

The redhead chuckled softly. "We can't exactly have a romantic moment in the hall, Yama-chan." 

Yamato blushed as Koushirou carried him inside. He leaned his head a bit to gently kiss his boyfriend's cheek and closed his eyes, perfectly comfortable. "I'm not really sure...what to do." 

"Just be yourself." Koushirou advised, and Yamato stuck his tongue out playfully, all of his earlier bad mood and sorrow gone like the wind. 

"I mean with the computer." 

Koushirou smiled. "So I'll help you learn." 

"Promise?" 

"Promise." 

Koushirou sat him down by the computer and started to instruct his boyfriend on how it all worked. Yamato paid strict attention as Koushirou put the computer back together carefully, and started it up. "Do you understand how to do this now?" 

Yamato bit his lip in thought. "I think so." He blushed some. "Could you...maybe make sure I do everything right?" Koushirou was almost certain that wasn't the _only_ thing that Yamato wanted to ask, but let it slide for now. "Um, could you...sit with me and hold me?" 

Koushirou nodded and slid behind Yamato in the chair. He gently kissed the blonde's ear, and smiled as Yamato snuggled back into him. "So?" Yamato asked nervously. "What do I do next?" 

Koushirou carefully instructed him on just what to do, and the two of them worked together to get everything checked out just perfectly on it. Yamato turned to look at him some time later. "Am I done?" 

"You're done." Koushirou nodded and smiled. "You just have to put the back on now." As Yamato carefully screwed it on, Koushirou watched him with pride. There _was_ a very good mind hiding underneath the cuteness and the blonde hair, and he liked showing him how to do things. Once the back was on, Yamato turned around and put his legs around Koushirou, kissing him. 

"Now we?" Yamato asked, grinning. Koushirou grinned back him, mischief in his eyes. 

"Have fun." Yamato squealed at Koushirou's statement and started to kiss him gently, their tongues writhing around one another in an exotic dance. A moment or two later, Yamato pulled back, his eyes wide in shock. "Yama-chan?" Koushirou looked concernedly at him, then realized the other had been startled by his arousal. 

"How are we going to play?" Yamato asked curiously. He wasn't a _complete_ idiot; he knew what that meant, but he wasn't going to jump into things. Not unless he knew Koushirou wanted to jump in with him. 

"Well..." Koushirou answered the question with kisses that trailed down Yamato like tiny pieces of fire. "What would you like to do?" 

"Whatever you want to do." Yamato replied, moaning softly at how sweet and wonderful those kisses felt. Koushirou smiled at him. 

"Anything with you." 

Yamato blushed gently; he had never felt this loved in his entire life. "So...I guess whatever _you_ feel like doing." He moaned softly as Koushirou's fingers danced across him in perfect counterpoint to where his lips were going. Koushirou's hands crept up gently under Yamato's shirt and stroked lightly, sending beautiful chills down the other's spine. "What are you doing to me?" 

"Touching you." Koushirou answered softly. Yamato quivered, his muscles shivering underneath Koushirou's fingers. 

"This isn't...how you always touch me." He quivered as Koushirou caressed him even more, his mouth falling open to welcome the redhead's tongue into it again. "I..I have no idea...what's going on. Kou-chan, please, what's going on?" 

Koushirou looked into his blue eyes. "Yama-chan, I love you, and if you want, I want to make love to you." 

Yamato turned the deepest shade of red that anyone had ever seen in their lives. "W-what??" Koushirou repeated it, and Yamato could hardly believe his ears. "I've never...will it hurt?" 

"A little." Koushirou was honest, and Yamato shivered some, biting his lip again in nervousness. "Yes, Yama-chan?" 

Yamato snuggled into him. "I'm scared...you...you wouldn't hurt me on purpose, right?" 

Koushirou held him gently. "Never." He loved Yamato too much to hurt him, ever again. 

Yamato snuggled into him. "Promise me you'll try to keep me from getting hurt?" Koushirou nodded, and Yamato trembled against him. "I want...to, Kou-chan." Koushirou started to kiss him again, and Yamato melted into his touch, abandoning all fear for love, for now and forever. 

* * *

Yamato hummed softly as he mixed up the batter. This was going to be the _best_ surprise ever for Koushirou, he was going to love it _so_ much. 

"Hey, gorgeous." The words came from behind him, and he jumped, turning around to try and block Koushirou from seeing what he was doing. The redhead smiled at him. "What's up?" 

Yamato held his hands behind his back, looking rather sheepish. "Making something." 

"Something?" Koushirou raised an eyebrow. "What kind of something?" 

"Um..." Yamato hadn't really kept up most of his cooking skills, but there was _one_ thing he could make no matter what, and he was doing it for Koushirou. "A baked something?" 

"Baked something?" 

Yamato nodded and smiled as he turned back to finish mixing, and blushed when Koushirou tried to peek over his shoulder. "Kou-chan, it's supposed to be a surprise." 

"I'll be _very_ surprised." Koushirou promised him. Yamato was confused. 

"But how can you be surprised if you see what I'm making?" This was very confusing. 

Koushirou smiled at him. "You'll see." Yamato sniffled a little; he _really_ wanted this to be a _real_ surprise for Koushirou. The redhead chuckled lightly. "All right. I'll go wait and be _really_ surprised." 

Yamato leaned his head back and rubbed it against Koushirou's chest. His boyfriend patted him gently on the head and smiled. "I love you, Yama-chan." 

"I love you, too, Kou-chan." Yamato stood up on his toes and kissed Koushirou on the cheek very lovingly. He turned back to the counter and bit his lip, blushing a little. As Koushirou started to leave, Yamato spoke quickly. "Kou-chan? Will you...stay here with me? Protect me, maybe?" 

Koushirou looked at him in surprise. "Protect you?" What could he _possibly_ have to protect him from? 

"Please?" Yamato looked hopefully at him. "Like you used to?" Koushirou nodded, and Yamato hurried over to throw his arm around the redhead's waist, looking for all the world as if he was never going to let go again. He rested his head on Koushirou's chest happily. "You used to always have me in your arms and always have me in your sight. You were always holding me, always watching me, always keeping me warm, always kept everything from hurting me. I liked that." 

"So did I, Yama-chan." Koushirou murmured, holding him gently. Yamato looked up at him. 

"I liked how safe that always made me feel and how important and special it made me feel." Yamato gazed up at him, all his love in those sapphire eyes. "I never told you that, did I? Never told you how much I appreciated everything you did for me, all of the things like that which helped me get through every day." Koushirou shook his head, and Yamato buried his face in his boyfriend's shirt, enjoying being so close to him. "This is even better than brownies." He murmured, the sound almost totally muffled by how close he was to his lover. 

Koushirou smiled down at him. "You should probably put those on to bake." 

Yamato looked up at him, then slapped his hands over his mouth, looking like a little kid who had let a secret slip by accident. "I wasn't supposed to let you know yet!" 

"I said I would be surprised, and I will be." Koushirou promised. "Trust me." 

Yamato grabbed his boyfriend's right hand in both of his and started to tug him towards the counter. He wrapped himself up in Koushirou's arms and smiled up at him. "When was the last time I made brownies for you?" He looked at the mess on the counter; twenty or more ingredients for his made from scratch brownies. 

Koushirou thought for a moment. "Back when we were first dating. My nineteenth birthday." 

"It's been too long then." Yamato snuggled back into him. "That was months before we..." He trailed off, not wanting to think about the horrible 'not with Kou-chan' time. "Kou-chan, could you get me the pan for these? I can't quite reach up there." 

Koushirou smiled; by the time they'd all finished growing, he'd wound up taller than Yamato. He reached up and carefully pulled the pan down and put it on the counter as Yamato slipped away to the fridge. "There you go, Yama-chan." 

"Thank you, Kou-chan." Yamato hurried back over there and poured the batter into the pan, then slid it into the oven and turned around. Koushirou smiled at him. 

"You're so good in the kitchen." Koushirou could cook, some things, but nothing like Yamato. The blonde grabbed his hand again and tugged him into the living room, pushing him gently towards the couch. They snuggled for a moment before Yamato leaped up to his feet again. 

"Oh! I almost forgot!" 

"Hm?" Koushirou was surprised as Yamato leaped out of his lap and ran back into the kitchen, then came back in with a tray of some kind, concealing it with his body the best he could. 

The blue-eyed blonde carefully displayed the tray once he got over to him. "I made these for you." He showed Koushirou what he had: a tray of homemade chocolates, truffles, fudge, and all manner of sweet things. Koushirou's eyes went wide and soft with love. 

"Oh, Yama-chan..." The surprise was more than evident, it was practically blinding. 

Yamato sat the tray down on the table and sat in Koushirou's lap, nuzzling gently. "I love you." He squealed softly as Koushirou returned the salute, and then grabbed a truffle, holding it for Koushirou to take a bite and proclaim it delicious. "I wanted to make everything up to you. And to show you how much I appreciate everything you've done for me, everything you've made me feel." 

Koushirou smiled at him. "Thank you, Yama-chan." 

"And I wanted to thank you for being so good to me, and for protecting me the way you do. For keeping em so safe. I love you so much. I'm so irrevocably in love with you." 

The two of them snuggled together, eating the chocolate treats and murmuring soft words of love and compassion and heartfelt wonder to each other for several minutes, until Yamato had to go get the brownies out of the oven. Once they were a little cooled off, he started to cut them up, and placed the first and biggest one on a plate. He retrieved a carton of vanilla ice cream from the freezer and carefully doled out one scoop on the brownie, then added homemade chocolate topping as well, then with two spoons in tow, carried it out to Koushirou with a smile. 

The redhead stared at it in surprise, almost visibly drooling, and smiled at him. "That looks..._wow_!" 

Yamato's smile brightened by several magnitudes. "You like?" As Koushirou nodded, the blonde sat it beside the tray and tugged Koushirou's hand to join him. He scooped some of the treat up into a spoon and held it up for his boyfriend, who nibbled it lightly 

"Delicious. Just like you, Yama-chan." 

Yamato blushed at the compliment, then snuggled into him. "Thank you, Kou-chan, for everything. Thank you for protecting me, for loving me..." He scrunched up his nose and laughed. "I sound like a sappy love song!" 

His boyfriend smiled at him. "What's wrong with a sappy love song?" 

"Nothing." Yamato grinned. "As long as _I_ don't sound like one. But, thank you, really, for protecting me, for loving me. For everything." He kissed Koushirou's cheek again. "Love you forever and ever. 

Koushirou smiled brightly. "Love you always."   
  
The End 


End file.
